Post your jokes
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MudFlap
Pursuit Driver
MudFlap
Pursuit Driver
...... you really don't want to upset Tommy Tutone.
cptlo
Pursuit Driver
Once there was a snail who was tired of being slow. He went out and bought a really fast sports car and had the dealer paint a big 'S' on each side of it.
Whenever someone saw him zooming past in his new car, they would say, "Hey, look at that S-car go!"
Little johnny's teacher ask who can use the word fascinate in a sentence?
Little johnny: My aunt has a sweater with 9 buttons but because her boobs are so big she can only "fasten-8"
What did the bucket say to the other bucket? you look a little pale
What do you call a Alligator in a vest? an investigator
How do you organize a space party? you planet
What do you call a potato on the news? a commentater
What kind of shorts do clouds wear? thunderwear
Whenever someone saw him zooming past in his new car, they would say, "Hey, look at that S-car go!"
Little johnny's teacher ask who can use the word fascinate in a sentence?
Little johnny: My aunt has a sweater with 9 buttons but because her boobs are so big she can only "fasten-8"
What did the bucket say to the other bucket? you look a little pale
What do you call a Alligator in a vest? an investigator
How do you organize a space party? you planet
What do you call a potato on the news? a commentater
What kind of shorts do clouds wear? thunderwear
What? Not one cat joke?
cptlo
Pursuit Driver
Ask and you shall receive!
Q: What did the grandma cat say to her grandson when she saw him slouching?
A: You need to pay more attention to my pawsture.
Q: Wanna hear a bad cat joke?
A: Just kitten!
Q. What does a cat have that no other animal has?
A. Kittens.
Q: Why don't cats play poker in the jungle?
A: There are too many cheetahs.
Q: Why was the cat sitting on the computer?
A: To keep an eye on the mouse!
MudFlap
Pursuit Driver
actually.... that's a pretty good price.
cptlo
Pursuit Driver
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
My boss told me to have a good day.. so I went home.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands.
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
When you look really closely, all mirrors look like eyeballs.
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? Roberto.
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
I ate a clock yesterday, it was very time consuming.
I know a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up? Because it was two tired!
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the physco path.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
My boss told me to have a good day.. so I went home.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands.
The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.
When you look really closely, all mirrors look like eyeballs.
What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? Roberto.
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
I ate a clock yesterday, it was very time consuming.
I know a lot of jokes about unemployed people but none of them work.
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up? Because it was two tired!
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden. The plot thickens.
How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the physco path.